Yeah, I'm supposed to be asleep right now.  But I can't.  So I'm awake reading the comments that people have left on my blog.  Reading the blogs associated with the comments.  Realizing that although I may feel as if I am the only one living through hell on earth, I'm not.  As a matter of fact, I am humbled to realize that my situation is actually not as bad as others.  Don't get me wrong, no situation is worse than the one you are living.  However, there are a lot of sick children in this world and a lot of hurting parents.

As I sit consumed by my own sorrows, I have been taken to my knees this weekend to think about the blood of Christ.  How on Good Friday our God allowed his son...his only be sacrificed for my sins.  I can honestly say that Gods' sacrifice means more this Easter than it ever has before.  I would never, ever begin to compare my hurt with God's, but I do know what it is like to lay your child at the altar.  The difference is that Jesus never had an option for salvation from his death.  He was born to die.   It's the only reason he was put on this earth.  Our God allowed his son to suffer and for a moment, carry the weight of the world's sin so that we all would have eternal life. 

Everyday I pray and pray that God would spare Lucy's life.  I pray that God would heal her.  Jesus never had that option.  What he did for us that day at Calvary can never be duplicated.  That one act of selflessness was the greatest deed in the history of this world.  For that I am eternally grateful. Really, really grateful. 

I look forward to tomorrow as we celebrate the miraculous act of Jesus rising from the dead.  I think of the story of Jairus' daughter.  He assures the people of the community that her death has not been in vain.  While Lucy is not "dead" I pray that her illness with not be in vain.  If God is going to allow her to be sick, I pray that somehow, someway God will be glorified through it all.  I am praying for a miracle the same way Jarius did.  I want God to just touch Lucy and make her well.  Still praying for the miracle of Biblical proportions.  Thank you dear God for dying on the cross for my sins.  Thank you for preparing a way for me in this rocky life and even in the afterlife.  I have faith because HE LIVES.

Today the girls decided they wanted to roast marshmallows.  So...what did we do?  We roasted marshmallows of course.  87 degrees.  Hot as heck.  We roasted marshmallows because the girls wanted to.  Not because it made sense and not because we particularly wanted to.  BUT because Ella and Lucy wanted to.  And that's the way we roll these days.......

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