Lucy with her Child Life Specialist, Ashley
Well, we all have survived day 2. Today was Cyclophosphomide and Mezna, which means we have started 48 hours of continuous peeing. It will make for a long night, but knowing we are so close to the end makes it more bearable. We had an interesting talk with the doc today. I asked him why the decision was made to go forward with the full dose of Chemo when there was an issue raised about Lucy's ANC being so low. Basically he said that it just came down to the fact that with her high risk cancer she needed all she could get. Wow! That hurt.
Not that we didn't know it and haven't lived it for months, but just hearing it again from a doctor was a painful reminder. After her recent good scans you find the ability to put the worst behind you and look forward to what is to come. The positive part of the conversation was Dr. S's reminder that the reason these MB (medulloblastoma) kids are blasted so hard with high dose chemo 4 cycles in a row is that it works. We are clinging to that tonight.
Lucy has been pretty sick today. Off and on, really. I can tell her body is tired and worn down from 4 cycles of this crap. Tomorrow when they take down her last bag of chemo I think I will cry. Maybe I'll do a happy dance. Maybe I'll do both. You might even hear me shouting "Praise God." Friday after she gets her cells the nurses and other staff on the floor throw her a "No Mo Chemo" party. I think that will be really neat for her.
On a side note, I may not be able to walk tomorrow. I started Day 1 of the Couch to 5k program today. The St. Jude campus served as my training facility. Let me just tell you, if you are going to start running after 7 months of being completely sedentary, a hospital is the best place to start. I really thought I might need oxygen when I was done. It was so bad that when I came back up to the floor and the nurse came to let me in she thought I was in distress. I reassured her I was only trying to fit back into my pre-baby, pre-cancer clothes and that the only way I was going to do it was to just go for it. No easing into anything. Just hit the pavement and start running.
I also got to love on Ella and Jack today. Oh how I miss them so!
Please pray that tomorrow will be a good day for Lucy. It's hard seeing her so sick. You'd think I'd have grown accustomed to it by now, but it never gets easier.